Yom Kippur Meditation

Back in Gabs!

I thought fasting for Yom Kippur would help with homesickness. It did, though not as much as reading some hard core sci-fi or listening to Legally Blonde: The Musical.

My host family thought I was crazy for fasting an entire day. And why not? I haven't seen another Jew in the last three weeks. I guess I thought I was crazy too. I was still drinking water, though, because it's 35-degrees and un-air-conditioned under a tin roof. Crazy, yes, but stupid, no. Or at least not in this particular situation.

I spent Kol Nidre with my host family. Fridays are special to the Batswana. Everyone spends time with family and visits friends. I had what was possibly the best conversation I've had so far this trip, with my host-uncle who was visiting. He asked why of my ideas that I had never even thought to question.

Why are you studying ecology?

I find it interesting.

Why?

I think that by learning about other species we can learn more about ourselves as humans.

Why does it matter, if humans are just destroying the environment?

I'd like to teach people how to protect the environment, and to try to repair damage that's already been done.

Isn't destruction of the environment necessary for development?

Yes, possibly, but I want to minimize that, perhaps find a happy medium between environmental destruction and stunted development.

I would guess that, living so close to New York City, you wouldn't care so much for the environment.

But that's why I'm here, because Botswana offers so many opportunities to study wildlife that I don't have in New York.

So what do you want here?

I want to protect the wildlife here, so we can learn as much as we can from the environment while it's still intact.

So we should stop development here to preserve the environment, but not in New York?

No, I want to find a way to make development less destructive.

Do you think that's possible?

I don't think it's impossible. (I had a fun time trying to convey that stentiment to a man whose first language is not English. In the end, I settled for "Yes, it may be possible" and then referenced an earlier conversation when we decided that at some point you have to accept a certain level of uncertainty and acknowledge faith. I'd elaborate more about that discussion, but I'm still to embarrassaed to admit to my parents that I believe in God. Oops.)

One more thought of my host-uncle's that I'd like to share is this:
Rejecting the concept of God because so many people have taken advantage of it for selfish reasons and caused destruction is like rejecting the benefits of modern medicine because some people abuse drugs for selfish reasons and create problems as a result of that.

At that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I want to study ecology. From the inside, humans are special. From the outside, we're just another species competing for survival until the day that giant meteor comes. Gosh, that's depressing, but studying wildlife is the best way, for, to gain insight on human nature because it provides a (somewhat) objective viewpoint.

For that same reason, I was in Otse, studying Setswana culture so I could get an objective-ish view of my own, by noticing the differences.

But, as host-uncle puts it, from the outside, both of our cultures are necessarily exactly the same because we're all of the same species vying for survival. We just think we're different.

And I fasted to remind myself how much of survival is luck, and though we're just another species, I have the ability to be grateful for all the luxuries I have been afforded, so I'm going to be grateful. It makes me happier. It also comforts me to know that while I was hungry and cranky in Botswana, my family and many friends were also hungry in cranky back in New York.